Stop and Smell the Roses

Today I heard a phrase I'm sure I've heard a thousand time in my life.  Stop and Smell the roses.  I don't think that anyone has specifically said it to me, but I've always known what people have meant by it.  That you can't rush through life.  Sometimes you have to take a break and make sure to enjoy the little things in life.

So when I heard the phrase today, I couldn't help but really stop and think about it.  Mostly because, at the time, I was actually watching a show and procrastinating on my writing.  (Well, rewriting.  I do have an editing goal I need to try and keep as I have beta readers waiting for it.)

I've never really been the one to be busy all the time.  However, in the last year I've found myself doing more and more things, and therefor finding my schedule getting more and more full.  There are weeks when I almost never go home after work.  Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining.  I love going out with my friends.  I love my critique group and all the different things I've been doing since starting writing.

So now, for the first time in my life, I find myself actually able to appreciate the saying.  I understand what it's like to get so caught up in everything that's been going on with my life that I forget to stop and see or appreciate all those little things.  I've done it, where all I can think about is the stress of getting a book written, or edited and forget that I love this.  I love creating a story, and there's nothing I want more than to share those stories with everyone else.

Of course, getting stressed means I start to feel overwhelmed.  When that happens I tend to stop working on whatever it is I need to get done.  Unfortunately that means I start smelling the roses a little too much.  I just stop.  I'll do pretty much anything to not work on the writing or editing that I have to do.  Today that happened in the form of watching the first season of Dead Like Me.

I know how to stop and smell the roses.  I do it all the time, even when I really shouldn't be.  That doesn't mean that I disagree with the message of it.  It doesn't matter what's going on in your life.  How stressful everything is, or how much you  have to do, every once in a while, you need to stop and take a deep breath.  Look around and realize that life isn't always about that to do list.  Sometimes it's about taking those thirty minutes you don't think you can spare to have a meal in the park while listening to the birds sing.  Sometimes it's finding the time in a week to watch that show you absolutely adore, because it inspires you, or even just entertains you.

Sometimes it's not about doing something.  Sometimes it's about not doing something.

Unfortunately for me, right now it has to be about doing something.  The roses will be there when I'm done, though, and I'm looking forward to smelling them again.

My First Characters

A conversation this week had me thinking about the first novel I ever wrote.  That would be the novel I wrote during nano 2010.  It was a short 50,000 words and was about an idea that had been bouncing around in my head for about ten years.  It was about the Greek Gods.  Basically the Gods had gotten into a war and, in essence, died.  I believe they had sacrificed their bodies in order to protect Mount Olympus, which would have given anyone to take it over the power to literally control the universe.  The Gods were only able to survive by coexisting in the bodies of their descendants (or the closest thing there was to them.  For instance, one god lived in the descendants of her brother, as she was a virgin goddess.)

At it's core, that probably sounds like at least a decent idea for a book, and I would actually agree.  Unfortunately, it wasn't executed all that well.  Not all the surprising, considering it was a first attempt.  Of course, that's the book that pretty much every single member of my family has read.

Anyway, thinking about that book, I couldn't help but think about the characters.

Now, I don't remember all of their names, I've simply created too many characters since then to remember them.  I do, however, remember the name of the main character.  Well, one of.  She was the first character I created for the book.  Acacia.  The spoiled rich kid, who was somehow more down to earth than pretty much any of the others.  Her parents were famous - an actress and director - who were always on the set of some movie.  The book was set in Calgary, and I have no idea why this famous pair would have a house here, but that was what I decided.  Her parents were never home and loved her through gifts.  She hated this, of course.  She just wanted their attention.

I don't think I've ever written such a Mary Sue character in my life.  But I loved her.  I loved that she hated her boyfriend, but was with him to gain popularity in her school.  I loved that she had a mental break down in the middle of school, ruining her reputation forever.  But, most of all, I loved that three books later I had her tortured and she not only survived, but somehow came out stronger.

I also had a pair of twins in the book.  Oddly only one of the twins had a POV.  The boy.  Don't ask me their names, cause I don't remember for the life of me.  What I do remember about them, though, is that he fell head over heels in love with Acacia.  I remember this because they got pretty close really fast.  They were practically dating by the end of the book.  This may not seem fast, but the book took place over a period of about a week.  The girl twin died in the third book, and his reaction wasn't anywhere near what it needed to be.  He was more distraught when Acacia was kidnapped and tortured.

Where Acacia didn't have any flaws, he had far too many.  He would have needed so much work, just thinking about it gives me a headache.  Yet there were parts of him that I loved too.  I loved that he could get distracted by a girl that he had fallen in love with at the worst times.  I loved that, in a group of females, he was the only non-fighter.  Most of all, I loved the fact that I was willing to take the risk of writing a male perspective on my first time around.

The final two characters were also female.  To be honest, I don't remember much about them.  One, the descendant of Aphrodite, was a tom boy with short spiky hair.  The other I remember even less, but at the time I remember thinking that they were the perfect cast, and when that book was finally written, it was definitely going to be published.  How could it not?

As you've probably guessed, that book has been shelved.  Actually, it's been filed away in a dusty folder in the back of my computer never to be seen from again.

So why am I telling you about it?  Well, as I said, I was talking about the book to a friend this week.  She asked me about it, and what it meant to me.  I told her that maybe one day when I'm a better writer, I might go back and rewrite it.  Give those characters the stories they deserve.  Right now, though, I see that book as the thing that told me I could do this.  I could become a writer.

Really, isn't that what all first books are about?  Very rarely are those first attempts the amazing piece of literature we thought they would be, but in the end they take us a step closer to being the published author we're dreaming of.  While I'm sure the book isn't nearly as bad as I remember it (it was set in the modern day, but no one had cell phones...before you ask, no, it wasn't explained...) I know that I will certainly never regret writing it.  Without that book (and the two others I wrote that November) I wouldn't be the writer I am today.

Being Productive

Normally I procrastinate so much that I don't get much done.  Especially when I'm editing.  I find it so hard to make myself actually want to start fixing and changing my story.  You all know exactly how much I love editing, of course, and I am very good at making sure I do everything but the editing that I'm supposed to be doing.

In a conversation with a friend this week (one B. A. Matthews) I started expressing my frustration with the fact that I'm really not getting anywhere with my stories.  That was when I realized something.  I can't be frustrated with not going anywhere, because the reason I'm not is because of all the procrastinating I've been doing.  It's not my manuscript's fault that I'm looking everywhere but at it.  It's not my characters' fault when they're constantly shouting at me about what they want to happen in the next book, or the one after that.  I can't write those stories, though, not when I'm not even done the first book.

No, there's only one person at fault in this whole scenario, and it's me.

I've been getting frustrated with myself.  I claim to want to write for a living.  To want to be a published author who is taken seriously and has a following, but how can I do that when I'm playing useless games on facebook instead of editing or writing?  How can I say that I want fans, when I can't guarantee that I'll be able to focus enough on the story in front of me to get it past the first draft?

So I'm making a new promise tonight.  I've done this before, I know.  I've committed myself to my writing more times than I can really count, but I'm still going to do it again, and I'm hoping to actually stick with it.

My first promise:  I am going to stop complaining about editing.  Especially on my blog.  I'm sure you're all as tired to hear it as I am to type it out.  Because, let's face it, complaining about editing is really just another way to avoid doing it.  And that's just a vicious cycle that I'll never be rid of if I let myself continue down that road.

My second promise: Get my manuscript out to beta readers by May 15th.  I currently have 2 beta readers anxiously awaiting (at least in my head) the arrival of my manuscript.  Having an actual due date, rather than an arbitrary goal, I'm hoping that I can actually do it.  I'm also still looking for a third beta reader.  If anyone's interested, please let me know.

My third promise: I'm going to go out of my way to try and find someway to like editing.  It may never work, but I'm certainly going to try.  I don't want to spend my entire life hating this part of writing, so I just have to look for that part of it that I like and latch onto it.

I'm hoping that I can keep these promises for longer than I've kept most of my previous ones (for the record, I have stuck with getting my blog posts up, but none of my editing/writing promises have been stuck to.)

Now it's time for me to start putting these promises into action.

Symptoms of a Writer

I haven't been writing for very long.  In fact, it's only been a year since I first started thinking about writing as a serious career.  Before that I wasn't even entirely sure that I could write a book.  It seemed well outside the realm of things I could feasibly do.  Anyway, in that year, lots of things have happened.  I've written novels (9 in total...none that have made it much further than the first draft) I've also had the opportunity to hang out with a lot of writers, which isn't something I've really had the chance to do in my life.

In the time spent with them, I've started to recognize certain patterns in the way they (okay, yeah, we...) act or think.  I've decided to post them so that anybody can recognize the writers in their life.

# 5 Playing The License Plate Game

This game may not be something that everybody knows, but the rules are you take the three letters in a license plate and figure out a word from them.  All three letters need to be used in the same word, and in the order they appear on the plate.  Technically the person who says something first wins, but I've also played where you keep going until someone can't figure out another word.

# 4 Perfect Punctuation in Texts or Private Messages

Most people tend to type in chat speak or the like.  Little things like brb or imo.  Most writers can't stand chat speak.  And to go beyond that, they tend to write in proper punctuation and capitalization.  It doesn't matter how few characters allowed in the text/tweet or whatever.  Making sure it's written correctly is more important than anything.

# 3 Fascination With Stationary

This means more than just notebooks or paper (though, trust me, there's quite a bit of that as well.)  I'm talking pens, notebooks, pencils, graph paper, day timers.  Really anything that can be looked at as stationary becomes like crack to writers.  The highlight of any given week can be going to a local Staples (or any office supply store, really) and most will spend more money than they really should have.

# 2 Disappearing Acts


Inspiration can strike at any moment.  Some of them are well timed, but more often than not, it couldn't be worse.  That's why most writers tend to carry some kind of notebook with them wherever they go.  This is so that, should an idea happen to occur to them, they have somewhere to record it so that it doesn't get forgotten.  When this happens, generally they'll disappear for a few minutes to write it down.  Don't worry, they'll come back.


# 1 Talking About Characters As If They Were Real

This is the most important one of all.  Writers tend to look at their characters as less things they've created in their heads for a book and more as real people.  For the record, yes we do understand that they're not actually real, but we also understand that things we make us should not have the capacity to lie to us, and therefore we make sure to be cautious.  If you know a writer, you will be expected to recognize the names, and maybe even know who they are.  I promise you that your writer knows how crazy this sounds, but remember: Crazy is a prerequisite for writing.


Well, there you have it.  The top five ways to recognize if you have a writer in your life.  Remember, not all writers will have all of these symptoms.  Some may even have none.  Be diligent.  Writers require the help of 'normals' in order to keep them from being hermits who type away at their computers in the dingy basement muttering to themselves and shunning humanity for not 'understanding' their work.  Take pity on your writer today.  Make sure they get enough sun and something to eat.  The kindness will be appreciated when the novel is done.

What We Need

I recently started thinking about all the little things I (and so many other writers) do in order to get through our projects.  (For the record I am, in fact, writing a blog post to avoid rewriting a chapter.  I know.  Shocker)  So, I thought I would share with you everything that I do.

Let's start right from the beginning.  My planning.  Just like everything else, I find I'm not able to do this just sitting in silence.  I've come to the conclusion that I just like to be surrounded by things that other people have created.  Shows that actors have acted in.  Songs sung by singers.  Anything that proves I'm not the only on in the world trying to be creative.  Or maybe just trying to get some of their creativity to seep into me.

For the brainstorming portion of my planning, I tend to throw on some show.  Whatever I'm trying to catch up on.  This may sound distracting to you.  I assure you, it is.  However, I am also taking in all the twists and turns that writers who have made it are throwing into the shows.  It give me ideas.  Sometimes it tells me exactly what I don't want to do, but that's usually better than what I had.  Occasionally this means that I get to watch that show twice because I got so caught up in my planning I literally lost track of what was going on in the show.  More often than not, though, I do tend to find myself dismayed by how little I got done.  Still, it works for me (usually) and I do come out with a much better story than I started with.

Actually plotting is completely different from brainstorming.  At this point I have to completely immerse myself in the story line.  Which means that watching other shows only distracts me from the plot I need to put together.  I get the two confused, or just completely ignore my own plot because, let's face it, I suffer from a severe case of theywritesomuchbetterthanido-itis.  This also means that I turn to another form of creativity.  Songs.  I have a playlist on my itunes.  (It's actually a work in progress.  I currently have 264 songs in the playlist, but that number is constantly changing.  Either I buy something new, or I delete something that just isn't working when I'm writing.)  While I'm plotting I usually throw on some music in the background and get that plot done.

Writing is a lot like plotting for me.  I need to fall into the story.  Be so surrounded by it that I'm never quite sure if this world is real, or if the story I'm writing is.  Of course, writing requires more of my attention because I have to actually pay attention to things like spelling and grammar (though I quite often fail on those even when I am paying attention).  When I'm writing I turn the music up a bit louder and throw the headphones in.  That way I'm not distracted by anything around me.  I barely hear people knocking on my door.  It keeps me focused, and helps me to make it through the writing.

Editing, my least favourite part of the writing game, is different than all the rest.  I have what I like to affectionately call my 'editing movie'.  Currently it's Star Trek.  I know that some people think that I'm productive while it's on because some consider it to be not a good movie, but the truth is actually the opposite.  I actually love the movie.  I've seen it so many times I can practically quote the entire thing (and I may have even done so on occasion before.  Don't judge me.)  That's how I can put it on and pretty much tune it out.  I can read the story or make the changes, because I'm not afraid of missing part of the story line.  I know it well enough that I can glance up for a second and know exactly what's happening.  Having a movie playing in the background seems to engage my mind just enough that I can get over the annoyed feeling of having to just sit and do one thing at a time.  I'm hoping that I'll get some more editing movies in the future, but right now I don't have enough time to watch a movie enough to get to that point.

I would say that most writers have their little routines.  Maybe not quite as strange as mine, but I know for a fact that I'm not the only one that listens to music as I write.  Some, of course, can't fathom listening to music.  I've had more than one person ask me if it distracts me.  Honestly, I don't really hear the music I'm listening to when I'm writing.  I use it to drown out the other distractions.  But every writer is different.

Teaming Up

My multiple projects have been the subject of a couple of my posts now, and it seems that this one is going to be no different.  Probably because I'm starting to feel a little overwhelmed by how much work I've managed to create for myself.  The fact that I actually want to add more projects to that list is really not the point.  The point is that despite how much I have on the go, I have yet to get anything completed.

I'm not the only one with this problem.  A friend of mine on twitter recently commented on a post a made.  It was a random one about having to finish my critiques before going away for the weekend.  She asked if I could look over some of her work, and I happily agreed (because I'm not nearly busy enough, I need to add a couple of more things to my schedule).  She told me that she wasn't close enough to being finished right at that moment, but she would be eventually.

The conversation went on in that direction for a while until she said something about another twitter friend telling her she needed to actually finish a project.  Pick one thing and actually focus on it.  It was so close to my own situation where I just keep project hopping, and never really settling in to get one done, that I couldn't help but tell her I had the same problem.

Of course, us being the writers we are, this realization that we had the same problem when it came to our writing quickly escalated into us have Wonder Twin-Multitaskers Powers.  Don't ask, it was late.

Anyway, while this may seem like nothing more than a random conversation, it was a lot more than that because of what came out of it: accountability.

I don't exactly have a great track record when it comes to being accountable to myself.  I tend to let myself off the hook more often than not, and that leads to things like entire weekends being spent getting caught up on TV shows as opposed to writing the book I was already 40,000 words behind on (no...that book is still not finished.  I no longer have and ETA on that, but I'm hoping eventually, as I have some serious plans for that series.)

Anyway, the point is, it was obviously not working.  Finishing a project isn't the same as doing something like nano.  There I have a chart I have to update daily, I have a word count goal that pretty much everyone in the city whose doing nano knows about.  I have other people working toward that same goal (Yeah, okay, maybe not exactly the same...theirs might be just a bit lower than mine...) that I can compete with to keep myself going.  Right now, though?  Right now I have nothing to keep that motivation.  And if I'm slacking on keeping myself accountable, nothing is ever going to get done.

That's where Moni comes in.  Since she's been having the same problems as me, we've decided to team up.  Create a system where we will be accountable to each other, and with any luck that will be what we need to get our projects moving forward again.

Of course, we haven't started yet.  With travelling over the weekend and critique group, not to mention the fact that we're in different time zones, we've decided to try and get started on Tuesday.  I'm hopeful that this will work.  There's nothing more encouraging than knowing there's another writer out there working on their projects at the same time as you and struggling just as much with the same issues.

Come Tuesday we'll see if we can actually get our projects done.  (I will be working on The Commons and getting it ready to be sent out, even though Pandora isn't done being written yet.  I would love to spend all of my time in Jayne's world, but it's really not fair to characters and plots I've already started.  Only once The Commons is out to beta readers will I allow myself to be pulled back into Pandora. Sorry Jayne.)

I will, however, be doing Camp Nano in June this year.  I don't know yet if I will just be writing the end of Pandora or if I will be writing something new.  I need to see how quickly I can get through my editing.  Either way, though, I'm glad that I found another writer than can hopefully help me through the multitasking cycle of starting a new project without finishing the last.

My Half Eaten Sandwiches

Ever since I was introduced to the idea of unfinished novels being like half eaten sandwiches, I honestly haven't been able to get the image out of my mind.  Someone wandering around with a sandwich in their hand munching away happily.  Suddenly a new sandwich appears, and they find themselves questioning whether they like the sandwich they're currently eating at all.  It doesn't take too much to convince them to put down that half eaten sandwich, pick up the new one and continue on their way, only to discover a new sandwich.

That is the very definition of me as a writer.  I have a long trail of half eaten sandwiches.  All of them ditched for something that seemed shinier or more interesting.  All of them, I'm sure, having some kind of potential that I just couldn't see.

I can already feel this very thing happening with one of the novels that I'm currently working on.  The Commons is a YA dystopian I wrote during nano.  I loved this book while I was planning it, I loved it while I was writing it, and I loved it after the first draft was done.

So what's the problem?  The same problem that I have every single time I finish a first draft.  I can't seem to get through the editing.

I know you've all heard me bitching about editing before, and I'm sure you'll hear it again (as it is my least favourite part of the writing process) but it is unfortunately what is currently holding me back as a writer.  It's what's keeping me from getting a novel to a draft where I can feasibly send it out to agents/publishers and try to take that step forward into actually becoming an author.

Ironically, I used to think that I could never finish a novel.  As in, writing the first draft.  I spent years beginning stories only to pretend that never happened.  Denying all the while that I did, in fact, have a story in me that I wanted to tell.  It took nano to make me realize that this was something I could, in fact, do.  That writing a novel wasn't just for those favourite authors whose stories I fell in love with.  I could do it too.

Out there somewhere I'm sure there's something that could motivate me just as much for editing, but so far I have yet to find it.  And without motivation, I've found the process of editing tedious and frustrating (just as I'm sure most writers do.  I believe it has something to do with writing being a creative process and editing being analytical.)

What I have to do is just sit down and force myself to do it.  To get the editing over with so that I can hold a completed manuscript in my hand.  To finally look at something I've written and think 'that's it!  I'm done!  It's ready to be seen.'

Which means that all of those sandwiches that keep appearing, shiny and new and looking oh so tasty, are going to have to be put on the back burner.  No matter how exciting they seem, or how much I want to write them, I need to finish, actually completely finish, a novel.  Time to finish one of these sandwiches!

Stop The Lies!

The other day I found a link posted on the facebook page of my local nano group.  I don't often follow links, but this one caught my attention right from the title, and after I read it, I felt like I had to share it.

The post was entitled '25 Lies Writers Tell (And Start To Believe)' (I would suggest that, even if you never follow links, if you're a writer, follow this one.  I promise you wont be disappointed.)  Of course, considering that I wrote a blog in which I talked about how writers lie to themselves (Click here to read that post) it's not really all that surprising that I was attracted to this one.  I wanted to see what another writer thought we lied about.

First I have to say, I thought it was hilarious.  I didn't stop laughing pretty much from the time I started reading the blog until I was done.  It's fantastic!  Not just what he says, but the way he says it.  The fantastic sarcasm he uses gives you wonderful (or terrible?) images in your head, and you find yourself agreeing with pretty much everything.

Anyway, like I said, there were a few things that I wanted to respond to (In no specific order):

3. I'll Come Back To This Story After I write This Other Story

This is something that I do.  In fact, I'm doing it right now (yes, I feel ashamed, no I'm not going to stop writing this novel...).  Some of the things he says in this are fantastic.  He compares this habit to "leaving a trail of half-eaten sandwiches".  It certainly left an image in my head that I've been unable to get rid of since that day.  This one is definitely something that a lot of writers do.

7. My Characters Are In Control

This one I do have a tiny bit of an issue with.  That's because I do, in fact, write by letting my characters take control of the story.  Now, I'm not saying (as he speculates in the post) that I'm yielding all responsibilities to my characters.  In fact, if the story sucks, trust me, I'm the one that takes the fall for it.  (I may be guilty of being too hard on myself.)  So, while I can understand that some people might use their connection to their characters to create an excuse to not write, I'm definitely not one of those writers.  (Sometimes I think my characters are a little too vocal.

17. This draft needs to be perfect.

Yep.  I'm a perfectionist.  At least, I tell myself I'm a perfectionist.  The truth is that I hate editing, so I end up settling for drafts that are probably far less than perfect.  At the same time, because those drafts aren't perfect, I never end up sending them out to anyone.  They sit forever buried in my computer never again to see the light of day.  I'm definitely guilty of this, but I'm working on it.  This year I'm going to get a book out there (before November, despite how busy I'm starting to realize I'm going to be.)  Just like I have to kill my inner editor in November, I guess I have to kill my inner perfectionist.

22. The (Insert System of Publishing) Is The Only Way To Do It

I understand what he's saying with this one, but I have to admit, there is a system of publishing that I prefer.  That would be traditional publishing.  While I don't have any kind of grudge against other types of publishing, or even think that they're not good, what I do know is that I couldn't self publish.  I'm not good enough at self promoting to get my name out there without the help of someone whose job is to help me do that very thing.  Now, I'm not saying that if I never get picked up by a publisher that means I'll never look into self publishing, I would just prefer it if I did get picked up by a publisher.


Those are the ones I wanted to comment on.  I'll like to reiterate that I loved this post (even if I did end up disagreeing about a few things) and I think that every single writer out there should read it.  If not to gain insight into the lies they're telling (which every writer does...don't think you're the exception), then for the pure entertainment value.